


Shutter Clicker, Heart Flicker

by Minky-way (Cardgamesonmotorcycles)



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Photography, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 11:59:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4347878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cardgamesonmotorcycles/pseuds/Minky-way
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noiz was certain he would never do Mizuki a favor again, although the free pizza he'd been blackmailed with obviously helped</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shutter Clicker, Heart Flicker

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Artsuki](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Artsuki/gifts).



> Prompt Fill- A mutual friend has this whole vision for their black and white photography class and we volunteered to be their models without knowing how sexual this shoot would turn out

"Oi, Mizuki!"

The burgundy haired boy turned, trying to see who had yelled his name above the crowd of heads in the corridor, moving as a relieved wave as the end of day bell rang, blonde hair and a glinting piercing drawing his eye as he ducked into a space behind the lockers.

"Yo, Noiz, what's up?" He asked, smiling as his friend caught up, flanked by Sei, smiling shyly but dark eyes roaming the crowd showing how anxious large groups of people still made him.

"Sei was saying you have some photography thing you need help with?"

"Oh yeah, I need two volunteers for it, it's for my end of class piece so it has to be good. I know exactly what I want though so it shouldn't be too difficult, just… I know everyone's busy so I'm not sure who to ask…"

Noiz raised a blonde eyebrow and Sei rolled his eyes in amusement at how dense he was. "I think Noiz meant that we'll do it."

Mizuki blinked, tilting his head and biting his lip as his friends watched him expectantly, "are you guys sure? I mean it might take a while, don't you have a computing exam soon?"

"I've got A*s on everything this year, I think I'll be fine." Noiz commented casually, missing the irritated twitch of Mizuki's eyebrow as he thought about how easily the German was able to pass everything with seemingly no effort whatsoever while he slaved away for B and C grades.

"I've already handed in my final piece for creative writing and my art exam isn't for two weeks, I have plenty of time." Of course, Sei's work was always completed stupidly ahead of time, often starting final essays the day he got them while Mizuki would hold off and procrastinate til the week of, or sometimes even the day of then work in a panic.

"Then I guess, if you guys are sure. When are you free?"

"I'm not doing anything this Saturday if that's any good?" Sei offered, knowing it had to be a weekend so they would be off college.

"Saturday's good for me," Noiz shrugged, though knowing him he wouldn't care if he had to skip class to be part of it, he was notorious for his low absence and natural genius.

"Awesome! So meet at my apartment at like… 1pm? That way you can have lunch first, we should be all done by five at the latest. I'll text you about outfits and stuff."

"…Outfits?" Noiz's curiosity was obvious in his tone and the eyebrow he raised at Sei, who just shrugged.

"Yeah, nothing too difficult, just hoodies and sweats and stuff, you'll already have all of it. It's just to fit the prompt." A voice piped up from behind them, and before Sei could think to ask what the prompt even was, Mizuki had been swept away by Koujaku and Clear, waving a goodbye over his shoulder.

* * *

Mizuki had been right when he said the shoot called for basic clothing, a quick text telling them to bring plain hoodies and sweatpants, as well as a plain coloured t-shirt and then, rather bizarrely specifying the boxers they should wear. The only acknowledgement Mizuki got that Noiz had even received the message was when the day of the shoot dawned, and Noiz decided it would be amusing to enter the apartment, door left unlocked, and promptly throw said boxers onto his head.

"Oi! Quit it! I nearly dropped the camera!"

"Not my problem, anyway, what is the prompt of this thing?" His eyes regarded the apartment, the same as always except what looked suspiciously like candles on the coffee table, nothing really given away.

"I didn't tell you? It's a black and white collection piece entitled 'insight into intimacy.' We have to capture moments between a couple that normally would go unseen, basically posed photo's made to look as natural as we can."

Noiz blinked, entirely sure he must have heard Mizuki wrong. "You have to take intimate photographs of people who look like a couple, and you're telling me to me do it with Sei?" He knew full well how protective Mizuki was of his Sei, and he'd always had a suspicion that he liked him as more than friends, so why the hell was he letting him do this? "Aoba's going to kill you."

"Well, yeah, I guess… Okay fine! So I didn't think it through!" His tone switched to irate remarkably fast, Noiz was almost impressed. "It's better you than Koujaku though, he might actually go there!"

"Are you trying to say Sei would never 'go there', with me?" He asked, tone a mixture of challenging and offended even as he unpacked the clothes from his bag, loosening his badge-studded tie.

"That's exactly what I'm saying," the finality in Mizuki's tone was definitely offensive to Noiz, who was almost certain Mizuki was completely wrong. But then, who knew Sei better? Mizuki, who'd been friends with him for almost five years, or Noiz, who had only been friends with him for two or so years?

* * *

By the time Sei arrived, apologising for being late and rather pink in the face, having apparently been cornered by Koujaku, who was out searching for new hairdressing volunteers, Noiz was in a worryingly flirtatious mood, determined to prove Mizuki wrong.

"Okay, so just start off on the sofa, we'll start with something basic to ease you in." He directed them, and they sat down, both looking somewhat uncertain, Noiz in particular since he knew the prompt. "Just, pretend you're watching TV. Or," he paused, flicking on the set to some kind of talk show, figuring the realism might help. "Actually watch TV."

He watched them for a moment, aware of the way Sei's eyes kept nervously flitting towards the camera and Noiz looked stiff as a board. "Okay, just relax alright, you look terrified. And sit closer together, you're meant to be a couple, remember?"

Sei blinked, "we're what?"

"Oh crap I never told you the prompt, black and white photos, moments between a couple that would normally go unseen." He explained rapidly, not noticing the way Sei's eyes widened in alarm.

"But we're  _not_  a couple, wouldn't it be easier to use a real one?" Sei reasoned, vocalising exactly what Noiz had thought.

"I don't know any! You two are friends so I thought maybe you wouldn't mind!" Their expressions showed that yes, they certainly did mind, a lot. "Please guys! I don't have time to find anybody else, it's due in next week and I have to pass! It's my final piece."

Sei rolled his eyes, heaving a sigh that Noiz didn't particularly appreciate, "so basically, we have to pretend to be a couple for the pictures?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry guys, I should have to-" But he cut off as Sei promptly moved himself across the sofa, closer to Noiz as he had instructed, almost sitting in his lap and pulling his arms to rest around his waist.

"This do?" He asked, face seemingly not at all bothered even as Noiz flushed pink, hands one layer of cloth away from touching Sei's flat stomach and oh shit, this was going to be difficult.

"Yeah that's um… That's perfect, Noiz, maybe put your head on his shoulder?"

He obeyed silently, knowing that if Sei was committing to this then he should too, and bugger any embarrassment he felt, although that was mainly because Mizuki was there watching them, which was hardly a normal situation. The sound of the shutter clicking was mildly distracting, and Mizuki had to reprimand both of them more than once for looking into the camera, reminding Sei of a particularly matronly teacher they had.

"He's like Mrs. Limz…" he muttered, eyes pretend focused on the TV, trying to relax against Noiz's body, the warmth making him feel somewhat drowsy, letting a yawn escape a second later.

"Hm, I can see him in a dress and waving a stick around," he agreed, surprised when Sei giggled, stomach wiggling against his fingers through his t-shirt and making him smile too, shutter sound barely even registering.

"Okay! I got some good ones there, next pose?"

"What now? Are you going to get us to pretend to fuck or something?" Noiz asked, pretending to not have noticed that Sei hadn't moved yet.

"Haha, not yet." Mizuki remarked, and all the blood drained from Sei's face, standing up abruptly.

"That better be a joke," he warned, tone remarkably similar to that of his twin's, Noiz would be nervous to be on the receiving end of it.

"Well, I mean, that makes it sound seedy… I've got this whole image guys, I really need your help. I'll owe you forever!" He was practically grovelling, and as uncomfortable as Sei felt at the idea of having to possibly simulate sex with Noiz, he knew Mizuki really needed their help, reminding himself to never let him forget this.

* * *

The next few poses weren't too bad, Sei pretending to wash up with Noiz draped over his back, Noiz taking a heavy bag off him at the door, though that one was harder to catch and they swore Mizuki took about thirty shots.

But then it began getting weird again. "Alright, so I need you in whatever you normally sleep in."

Noiz stared at him flatly, "if you want to see my boxers, you only have to ask."

"Yeah, you wish, guys pleaaase?"

Once again, his begging did the job and they ended up in the kitchen wearing their impromptu pyjamas, which for Noiz were green boxers, and for Sei were black boxers and a hoodie, which he had insisted on wearing for modesty. Mizuki had suggested he wear Noiz's hoodie to fit the theme better, and he had little complaint, just wanting to cover himself up.

"Up on the counter, Sei," Mizuki ordered, and Sei jumped up onto the blue tiles, cold against his bare legs, legs swinging in the air. "Noiz, in between his legs."

The dirty looks he was receiving didn't seem to be registering, just smiling encouragingly as Noiz reluctantly obeyed, trying not to notice Sei's blush as he parted his legs so he could fit neatly in between them. He tried to offer a reassuring smile but it just made Sei blush more, looking away to where Mizuki stood, not even looking at them as he adjusted the settings on his camera, muttering about bad light levels.

"Yeah that's great guys, Sei, arms round his neck please. Noiz, waist again, and pull him a bit closer, you're meant to be together, remember?"

"I'm going to kill him when this is over," Sei muttered as Noiz sighed through his nose, shifting

so close their barely covered crotches were millimetres from rubbing and this was a  _lot_  closer than he'd planned on getting to Sei.

"Not if I do first," Noiz agreed, knowing that if they didn't get there, Aoba definitely would, ripping Mizuki's head off for forcing Sei to do this stuff with Noiz and destroying his innocence or some such crap. Sei's arms wrapped round his neck and drew them even closer together legs brushing and Noiz's height advantage scuppered by the counter, meaning their faces were basically level. "Now what?"

"Okay, so I need you to kiss him."

There was silence, then all hell broke loose.

"Oh hell no!"

"Mizuki! I'm not going to kiss Noiz!" Sei objected, looking mortified at the very suggestion, face pink and expression hard, Mizuki actively cringing backwards at their combined outrage.

"Guys! It's all in my plan, it's only for this shoot! It doesn't have to mean anything! And you've both kissed people before, right?"

Sei had to concede, that yes, he had indeed kissed someone before, and Noiz obviously had too if the irritated look on his face was anything to go by, turning back to him apologetically.

"It's just for his project, right?"

"Mm," Sei nodded, though his heart was thundering in his chest, eyes staring at Noiz's bare chest because it was the safer option than looking up and meeting his eyes.

"You can change the pose if you want, but I need you to kiss." They didn't react and he sighed, realising this was harder than he had anticipated. "I'll buy you both pizza every week for a month."

"Twice a week for two." Sei bargained, waiting until Mizuki nodded, mumbling about not being made of money until he glared at him and he promptly shut up, raising the camera. "Whenever you're ready guys."

They didn't move for a minute, and Noiz was just glad Mizuki didn't speak again, it was weird enough having to kiss his best friend who he might have a teeny tiny crush on, let alone knowing their first kiss was being watched and caught on camera. It was hardly a normal situation and he felt odd about it, dragonflies in his stomach fighting to escape as he licked his lips nervously.

"Okay?" He asked, eyes flitting from Sei's eyes to his lips and back up again, swallowing hard as he just nodded, fingers playing absently with the short hairs at the nape of his neck, probably trying to distract himself, though all it did was send shivers up Noiz's spine.

The sound of the shutter drowned out as he moved one hand, the position they were in was uncomfortable and downright unnatural, if he was going to kiss Sei, it wasn't like this, sliding it up his back. He cupped his jaw, seeming so delicate in his large hand, tilting his face up to meet his, and swallowing thickly as Sei's eyes met his, half lidded and more calm that he'd expected. Their noses bumped and it was Sei who closed the gap, shuffling forwards as much as he could so they pressed close together from groin to chest, just a brush of lips at first, both uncertain, and of course they were, they were best friends, this was hardly a normal situation for them. But Noiz gained confidence quickly, arm wrapping round his back and the hand on his face tilting him to the left, parting his lips so they could move in harmony, small sigh leaving Sei's throat and oh god this was not good but it was so good.

The only issue was, Noiz didn't know how long they were meant to keep this up for, usually Mizuki told them when he was done and they could stop, but this wasn't some frozen pose, this was them kissing, which was getting hotter by the minute. Sei's fingers knotting into his hair and his tongue coming to gingerly poke at Noiz's, and surely he was being more enthusiastic than was really required? Or maybe Noiz was imagining it. A breathy moan broke his thoughts and Mizuki shattered them a second later, voice sheepish and laughing uncomfortably as he spoke.

"Shit guys, that was great, um… Well feel free to continue, but we're done with this shot."

They separated the moment he spoke, jerking apart as if they'd been in a trance, both bright red as they realised that Mizuki had been watching that less than innocent display, Sei biting his bottom lip, swollen and damp. Noiz wanted to run his thumb over it.

"I'll get the next scene set up," Mizuki spoke again, voice soft as he left them there in his kitchen, still holding each other close and not sure what to say.

"Um," Noiz breathed, having no idea what to say, what if Sei had just been doing that for the shoot like they were meant to? What if he hadn't felt the tug in his chest Noiz had the moment their lips touched?

But his worries were assuaged quickly, Sei's fingers coming to rub at the furrow between his brows, relaxing his face immediately and making him feel stupid, of course it was okay, they were friends, and they would continue to be. But oh, his chest hurt.

"Come on, we better go before he gets suspicious," Sei smiled, sliding off the counter when Noiz released him, losing their even height and returning things back to normal. "Oh, wait, I, um… Messed up your hair, a little."

Sei's cheeks were flushed and his dimples were seemingly a constant feature on his face as he stood on tip-toe to fix his hair, hands carding through it carefully, returning it back to a less untidy state. Lingering in the hair behind his ears and smile fading, expression unreadable and intense as he leaned closer and kissed Noiz once more, lips parted and touch soft, not stopping the hand that rested on the small of his back as Noiz kissed back, once, twice.

"Mm," Sei sighed quietly as he stepped back, not meeting his eye as he took his hand and led him towards whatever the next shoot would hold, "let's go."

* * *

Mizuki's gaze was knowing as he regarded them approaching, Sei dropping Noiz's hand the instant they were out of the kitchen, trying to glare at him and not succeeding.

"Okay, this is the last one guys, then you're free." He led them into his bedroom and Noiz was already nervous, blood pounding loudly in his ears and noticing the tripod set up at the end of the bed with alarm.

"If you're trying to film a porno I am not up for that," Noiz remarked, although he had to be honest, the idea of making his own sex tape had never been that abhorrent to him.

"No need to worry," Mizuki smiled sunnily, as if he hadn't given them plenty of reason to do exactly that over the course of the last few hours. "You just need to cuddle, like you're asleep."

"Cuddle?" Sei asked, face blank and heaving an exhausted sigh a second later. "Ugh, let's just get this over with."

"You have to take that hoodie off though." Sei was about to object, holding the oversized material closer to himself, not exactly happy about being in his boxers as it was, without having to be in just them. "You'll be under the covers, its fine. There's two poses I want you to do, start off just spooning."

"Who's the big spoon?" Noiz asked, unable to hide the amusement in his voice at just how ridiculous and oddly sexual this had turned out, wondering if Mizuki could have chosen something less intimate for his project but deciding now was definitely too late to ask.

"You are," Sei remarked blankly, "you've been in charge so far, so it makes sense."

"Exactly," Mizuki nodded.

"This is fucking weird," Noiz said, gesturing to the bed they lingered by nervously. "Like… Really fucking weird."

"Three months of pizza." Mizuki bargained, looking as exhausted and done as them now, even though he'd been the puppet master of this lunacy.

"Fine," Sei snapped, yanking the hoodie off and flinging it at Mizuki, pleased when it tangled around his camera and he had to unwrap it carefully, grumbling the whole time. He climbed into his bed, feeling strange about that as it was, not to mention that Noiz followed him a second later. It was like some horrible low-budget amateur porn shoot, and he could really do without those kinds of thoughts going through his head now.

"I am never helping him with anything ever again," Noiz grumbled from behind him, knowing now that hesitating from embarrassment would only drag out the horror further, promptly pulling Sei into his body and wrapping an arm round his middle, offering a "sorry," when his breath hitched in surprise. "Get this over with, asshole. I'm hungry for that pizza."

"Okay, okay, Sei, move your head back a bit, arms above the covers please."

Sei was too far past caring to even comment that now he wasn't under the blankets at all, and his entire chest was in fact exposed.

Mizuki danced around them like some kind of manic observer at a zoo, clicking shots in different poses, from behind Noiz, from above, standing on the bed while they pretended to sleep, eyes shut and ignoring the sounds of him moving.

"Can you link your fingers?" The sound came from directly in front of Sei's face and he jerked rather harshly, head smashing into Noiz's chin.

"Oh crap! Sorry Noiz! Are you okay?" The German just nodded as Sei twisted to check, then he met Sei's eyes, and they both started laughing, at the situation and its ridiculousness, at their embarrassment, at Mizuki's stupid enthusiasm.

"This is insane!" Sei giggled, turning fully and hiding his face in Noiz's chest, laughing against his skin and thanking God it had been Noiz and not anyone else, thinking it would have been a million times worse with any of their other friends. Noiz was laughing too, stomach contracting and his arm shaking where it was still around Sei, "A-Aoba's going to kill us!"

"Oh fuck, I didn't think of Aoba… Do you think he'll be mad?" Mizuki's face had paled and his camera finally stopped clicking as his eyes grew wide, taking in Noiz and Sei's disbelieving faces and shaking his head. "We're done guys, well done."

"Oh, finally," Sei remarked good naturedly, yawning, the combined warmth of the bed and Noiz's heat actually making him quite sleepy. "I might just have a nap while you order pizza, barbeque chicken should do it."

"Meat feast for me," Noiz added, grinning darkly at their friend, who just sighed and left the room, sound of him phoning the pizza place a second later making him smirk in amusement, maybe this had been worth it after all.

"Ugh, I need to put my clothes back on," Sei grumbled, squirming out of the bed, not actually wanting to fall asleep, especially if there was pizza on the way. He yanked on the hoodie he'd thrown at Mizuki, looking over to the bed where Noiz reclined, looking remarkably at home, sudden thought that he looked like they'd just had sex running through his mind and ugh, he should not be thinking that.

"That isn't even yours," he commented, Sei just shrugged and left to find his pants where he had left them in the bathroom.

"I ordered your pizza, you mercenaries." Mizuki remarked when Noiz joined them a second later, not bothering with a shirt for some unknown reason that kept Sei's cheeks tinted pink. "I'm never letting you help me again."

Both Noiz and Sei felt fully justified in the pillow attack he came under seconds later.

* * *

"Noiz! What the hell have you been telling people?!"

The German barely blinked, looking up from his pizza, courtesy of Mizuki, at the seemingly enraged Seregaki, "about what?"

"I have had twenty four different people saying what a cute couple we are and asking when we got together! What have you said?"

Noiz blinked, "what? I haven't said anything… Maybe Mizuki showed someone his assignment and they got the wrong idea?"

Sei just stared at him blankly, watching as he shoved the rest of his pizza slice in his mouth, he'd been weird since the shoot, although obviously enjoying the free food he got in return, something had been off. He'd been acting strange around him, not taking his elbow to lead him through crowds like he normally did, laughing less and staring a lot more.

"We should go ask him, I want to know what grade he got anyway," he suggested, watching as Noiz just nodded, shouldering his bag and leaving his dirty plate on the table, following him through the cafeteria where he noticed people staring and pointing in a very unnerving manner.

But they were stopped before the exit, group of girls surrounding them almost intimidatingly and beaming, pushing the leader forward to speak to them, Sei shrinking towards Noiz under their attention.

"We just want to say that you two are so cute together," she didn't notice the look Sei shot Noiz, who looked utterly bemused as she flipped her hair and continued, looking at them like she'd always wanted them to get together. "The pictures are adorable, you photograph so well!"

"Wh-what photographs?" Noiz asked, feeling bile rise in his throat because oh shit no he hadn't…

She laughed uncertainly, turning to her friend, red headed and somewhat plainer, "the one's Mizuki took? For his presentation piece?" They just stared, realisation dawning and both feeling dread creep up on them, mixed with a desire to rip Mizuki's head right off. "Haven't you seen them yet? They're all anyone's talking about, they're leagues above the other displays."

"No, we haven't yet, where are they?" Sei's smile was sunny enough, voice quiet and calm as he addressed them, thanking them politely when they said there was a display in the art studio and walking away, leaving Noiz to smile awkwardly before following him.

* * *

A head of blue hair blocked their route into the studio and Noiz felt his stomach plummet to his feet, trying in vain to hide behind Sei, who paled as his twin glared at them, although mainly at the German.

"Care to explain?" He demanded, hands on hips in a way very reminiscent of Tae-san, scowl enough to make Sei cringe, looking to Noiz for help. "Any particular reason you didn't tell me you were together? Or were you just keeping it a secret?"

"We're not together," Noiz remarked truthfully, watching as Sei nodded vehemently at his side, trying not to feel too upset by his enthusiasm to dispel the rumours, almost as if the idea offended him. "We just helped out with his project for him, he bribed us with pizza."

"As believable as it is that pizza would work, you were kissing in one of the photos,  _kissing!_ " Aoba's voice had risen to an almost hysterical pitch and Noiz winced, wondering how Sei felt about the fact that half the school had seen a photograph of them essentially making out on Mizuki's kitchen counter. It made him feel weird and he'd been there. "You could have at least told me, Sei! And you! I cannot believe you've had your hands all over my brother!"

"It was just for his-"

"I don't care! Look at the pictures for yourself, I'm pretty sure nobody thinks that they're just for show." With that, he stormed away, snapping angrily at Clear who waited for him by his locker, pink eyes filling with hurt even as he jogged after him.

* * *

They found the display easily enough, the crowd of admiring fans around it made it stick out in amongst the other projects, which seemed to mainly depict other couples, most of whom looked like parents or grandparents of the students.

The crowd parted for them as they made their way forward, own faces staring back at them in unforgiving black and white, blown large on the glossy paper they were printed on. Some of the shots were the ones they'd posed for, but there were some taken in other places, in a corridor at school as Noiz approached Sei, smiling in anticipation, in Mizuki's flat, fighting over the last piece of pizza, Sei straddling Noiz as he grabbed for it. Oh dear, they looked really good. Aoba was right, even in the candid shots they looked like a couple, smiles soft and touching too much for any normal friends.

The ones they'd posed for drew Sei's eye first, pupils blown large as his eyes flitted over them, nostrils flaring as he tried to control the terror that swarmed his body.

Them in Mizuki's kitchen, faces millimetres apart and eyes lidded, bodies tucked close together and looking so fucking intimate. He could hear the squeals and comments of the people behind him, but they didn't register, staring at the photo Aoba had meant, the one of them kissing, his fingers wound into blonde hair and cheeks flushed even without colour.

They were amazing photographs, that was for sure, none of them looked posed, but that was the whole problem, it looked too natural for Noiz to be wrapped around his middle, to be cuddled together on the sofa.

To be in bed together. Topless, cover just low enough that his eyes could trail down the blonde hairs of Noiz's navel, but too high for it to be obvious that they were wearing boxers.

His breath hitched and he felt dizzy, oxygen not coming fast enough because they looked naked. They looked utterly naked and he felt like he was going to throw up because that was bad he didn't want people to think he was some kind of whore. His face buried in Noiz's chest, scrunched up with laugher, German's fingers raised on his back as if they'd been rubbing circles into the skin but if they had, he didn't remember.

Noiz was beside him, looking at the images silently, expression giving nothing away, "Wow, we really do look good…"

"That's what you're focusing on?! Oh God, nobody is going to believe it's not real… They'll never shut up about it. I… I don't want people thinking things like that about me…"

Sei's voice was rising in panic, cheeks pale and fingers shaking as his breathing grew more erratic and his fingers twitched restlessly, entire disposition screaming fear. "I can't… I mean, this isn't right I shouldn't have… Oh God and they all think I…"

Noiz could sense a panic attack before it started, knowing he needed to get Sei away from all these people and away from the source of the terror he knew filled every inch of him, breath hitching and catching in his constricting throat. He reached for his wrist, trying to lead him out before the people pressing around them started asking questions and made it worse but he jumped at his touch.

His eyes were completely black, mouth parted and swallowing hard as he turned and practically ran out of the room, not apologising when he ran into someone and leaving his muttering fans behind, staring at Noiz as if commanding him to go after him.

But he didn't need telling. He knew where he'd be after all, on the roof where Mizuki often went to smoke and Noiz did too when he escaped from lessons, climbing the stairs slowly and ignoring the people whispering about him as he passed.

* * *

He was of course, exactly where he expected, in the secluded corner they often ate lunch in, curled into a ball and back heaving as he tried to catch his breath, jumping when Noiz rested a hand on his neck, rubbing the tension out like he always did when this happened. But this time he didn't push him away, whether because of the lack of crowds around them, or something else, Noiz didn't know, he just continued to massage his shoulders until his breathing evened out and he could sit up straight again.

"You okay?" He asked, keeping his voice soft, hand a warm weight on his shoulder, thumb brushing over skin soothingly.

"No," his voice shook but he still managed to sound personally offended by the stupid question. "Those photos are… We looked… We're not meant to look like that! We're best friends, we shouldn't look so… convincing! Oh God and everyone thinks it's true!"

"Would it be so bad if it was?" Noiz asked, unable to stop himself, just wanting to know his opinion on it, the photographs having stirred something deep within him, almost a nostalgia, homesickness, whatever.

"Well, no, I guess… I mean… It's nothing bad about you! Just… people are going to think things, they're going to think we've done  _things_. I don't want people thinking that about me!"

"Why does it matter? We know it's not true, and Mizuki does, and we can explain to everyone else. They'll have forgotten about this in a week, then it'll be back to normal again. Nobody will think anything, has anybody said anything mean to you so far?"

Sei shook his head, and he looked exhausted, head sinking onto Noiz's shoulder, panic draining all of his energy and making his limbs feel heavy even as the German hugged him, planting a kiss to his forehead unthinkingly, lime eyes widening as Sei froze.

Shit.

"What…" Noiz could hear him swallow, gut twisting into snakes. "What do you think of them? The photographs?"

He was walking on eggshells here, he knew that, Sei's opinion on the matter was already obvious and he was trying to hide how he actually felt, numbness spreading through him at being pushed away again. "Hm, well they're good. Mizuki did a good job, I reckon we've got him an A, easy."

"That's not what I meant." Noiz had known that the moment he asked, he didn't want his objective view on them, comments on the choice of camera lens and recommendations for future lighting set ups.

"Well, they're not real so I don't really…" Sei was looking at him, he could feel the dark eyes on his skin and he chewed his lip piercing nervously because fuck he knew! "Well, we looked… I dunno, good together. I mean, I kinda see why they'd think they were real. Even the secret ones we look…"

"Like more than friends."

"Yeah," he agreed lamely, not sure what was going to happen now but sure it wasn't going to end well, preparing himself for his love to go unreturned once more, but somehow this already hurt more than his parents shoving him away.

"Do you think…" Noiz heard his inhale, escaping as a sigh a second later, words dying out. "I mean, that photo of us… kissing. I… Most people would never have done that, I mean… He could have taken another photo, we didn't  _have_  to."

Sei was right, Mizuki wouldn't have forced them, there was literally no logical way he could have made them kiss other than if they agreed to, which, like Sei said, most friends would flat out refuse to do. But what was he saying? Was he implying that some part of them had wanted to? Or just a part of Noiz?

"Well, I guess not… But… I mean it wasn't  _that_  bad." No, it had been good, really good, like… He couldn't stop thinking about it, dreaming about it, daydreaming about it. Every time Sei smiled, or nervously chewed his lip, or popped gum, he thought of those lips on his, their plumpness, the taste, the soft sounds Sei had made and before he knew it his heart was racing.

"You think?" He asked, and his tone was so goddamn neutral Noiz had no idea how he was supposed to respond, given no cues, he was blind.

"Well, yeah, I mean… I'd do it again. If I had to."

He could hear Sei licking his lips, thinking hard, head solid against his shoulder and he realised he could feel his breath tickling his neck. "Only if you had to?"

"Well…" He didn't know what to do, whether to tell the truth and admit that all he'd wanted to do ever since was kiss Sei, or if he should lie and say that yeah, he'd only kiss him again if he had to, or maybe if he was drunk and just felt like kissing someone. "Not necessarily."

It was almost scary, putting himself out there like this, admitting his hidden feelings to somebody other than himself, especially when he'd been denying them himself for so long, stupid photo shoot only cementing them. He waited with baited breath for Sei to respond, to push him away and call him disgusting, to say he didn't want him anywhere near him, that he couldn't believe he'd hidden this from him. But maybe he was just being negative, maybe Sei wouldn't mind, and they could still be friends, he'd say he was sorry, but he didn't feel the same, he just did the shoot to help Mizuki and it meant nothing to him.

Sei's voice broke the ice between them instantly, cracking sound deafening in the German's mind, "if I asked you to kiss me, would you?"

Yes. Yes, a million times yes, until he ran out of breath and was forced to stop, until he was red in the face and couldn't bear it any more, until he'd touched every inch of Sei's skin, kissed every part of him twice over and once more for good luck. "If you asked."

"So, I'm asking. Kiss me."

Sei's expression was unreadable as he shifted, looking up at Noiz, face close, too close as he struggled with his internal conflict, screaming at himself to do it while he had permission, this could be his last chance. Kiss him.  _Kiss him!_  KISS HIM!

"Wh… Why are you doing this, Sei?" He couldn't meet his eyes, he'd break under their piercing gaze, the one that had the power to make his knees turn to jelly or make warmth bloom in his chest. Brightening up the worst day and lifting him out of the deepest depressions, just getting to see it was enough for him, to know it was specially, solely for him.

"You said if I asked, you would."

"That's not the point," he knew he was going back on his word, but he hadn't expected Sei to take it at face value, trying to pretend he couldn't see the hardness growing in his friends face.

"Then what is? If you hadn't wanted to you could have just said, Mizuki would have understood. Or were you just messing with me? Is that it?"

"No, Sei, I-"

"No! I know how you are with people, Noiz! You never settle down, you just use people for what you want and then you leave them, you've done it so many times!"

He felt sick, everything was wrong, Sei was angry, shifting away from him and saying these horrible things, things he never knew, never would have guessed actually bothered him. He knew he wasn't exactly the best when it came to relationships, Sei was right, if he felt the need for affection, or love or whatever, he'd just find someone at random. He was good looking and charismatic enough that it was easy enough to find people willing to spend the night with him, filling his need for human touch, or sex or whatever it was he felt he needed. But he would never do that to Sei, he'd never felt like this for someone before, the people he'd been with had just been to pass the time, to keep his head from going crazy, to make him feel normal again, like he wasn't disgusting and that he was needed.

"You didn't have to kiss me, you didn't have to do any of it! I… I even kissed you again, after Mizuki had gone, and you kissed me back. Why? You didn't have to! Nobody was forcing you! Or did you just do it because why the hell not? You can't just use people, Noiz!"

"You think I don't fucking know that? You think I was just messing around? Jesus, Sei, I know what I do! Everybody knows what I do! Want a fuck? Go see Noiz, he's up for it, no strings attached, he won't even acknowledge you afterwards. The perfect fucking arrangement." This was all wrong, Sei's eyes weren't soft like they always were, hard like marbles and twice as cold as the space between them made him feel."

"You're unbelievable." He was standing up, walking away, pushing Noiz away and this wasn't how it was supposed to go, grabbing his wrist before he thought it through. Pressing their lips together but this was wrong wrong wrong and when Sei's hands pushed him away he didn't stop him, the trembling of his lip making him feel like he was choking.

* * *

 

"Where is he?" He demanded, grabbing Koujaku's shoulder roughly and turning him around, ignoring the twittering girls that surrounded him, curling their hair and giggling sickly sweet.

"Who?"

"Mizuki."

"In the art studio I think, hey, what's this about you and Sei?" His grin was teasing but he looked genuinely pleased and Noiz was going to throw up acidic bile on him if he stayed any longer, ignoring the proud pat on the shoulder and turning round. "Oi! Noiz?"

He didn't look back, didn't stop even as people moved out of his way, anger clear on his face and in his clenched fists, didn't stop until he was in the studio and there he was smiling sheepishly under the praise of the students who admired their work.

"You fucking asshole!" His hands slammed into his chest, pushing the air out of him and sending him into the wall, no time to react, people scattering around them and someone gasping in shock. "This is all your fault! You and your stupid fucking project!"

Mizuki reacted fast, hands coming to grip Noiz's where they continued to shove at him, back hard against the cold wall and what the fuck was going on? "Noiz! What the hell, get off!"

"Why didn't you tell us it was a fucking exhibition? You lying asshole!"

"Get off me," the photographer's voice turned harsh and he pushed Noiz away, chest heaving as he regarded him, glare weakened by his clear confusion. "What the fuck is your problem?"

"Sei is my fucking problem! He's fucking pissed at me and it's your fault!"

Mizuki looked genuinely confused, and if he hadn't been in such a foul mood he might even have felt sorry for him. "What? Why?"

"Because of your shitty photos! He freaked out, you know the whole school is talking about it? So I went to calm him down and he flipped out at me, he thinks… I don't know what he thinks!"

"I… I thought you knew it was an exhibit, final pieces always are. I didn't think you'd mind!" He hadn't thought it through, he realised that now, he'd assumed and hoped, been so desperate to get his work done he hadn't even bothered to consider their feelings. "Listen, I'm sorry he's upset, but I didn't make you do anything."

"That's the fucking issue! You didn't make me do anything, but he thinks I did it because I had to and he's fucking wrong and now I've upset him!"

"What do you mean he's wrong?" But the German had already turned to leave, shoving through the interested crowd of students who had gather, hoping for a fight. "Noiz!"

He wasn't walking fast enough, an arm on his and he was spun around to see Mizuki, face determined but soft. "What do you mean, he's wrong? You don't…"

Noiz averted his eyes, black and white images filtering through his head, cold kitchen counters and warm bedsheets, soft skin and deep black eyes.

"Oh shit, you do…" His olive eyes were wide with realisation, results of his actions crashing into him like a tidal wave. "Fuck, listen, I never would have got you to do it if I'd know, I thought you were the best people to ask because you were such good friends you'd just laugh it off."

"Does it look like I'm laughing?" Noiz spat, because really, who could make out with their best friend and then laugh it off? Not him, that was certain, and not Sei either.

"No, um… Listen, you need to explain to him. I mean, you like him, right?" He didn't get an answer, but then, he didn't really need one, his clenched jaw was enough. "Just tell him how you-"

"He thinks I'd just use him. Like I do with everyone else." His voice was bitter, and now Mizuki realised it wasn't directed at him, or Sei.

"Then tell him you won't, say you're sorry, and that you didn't want to upset him. He wouldn't be upset if he didn't feel something." He couldn't say anything about using people, he didn't get around as much as Noiz, but he was no stranger to flings and occasional one night stands, not sure if they did it for the same reason, but knowing how hard it could make things when you wanted to be serious with someone. People saw your reputation first and didn't think of the reasons behind it.

"Yeah." He nodded, "you… Your pictures aren't shit."

"I know, that's why I got an A," his grin was wide as he turned, someone hailing him from down the hallway. "Go talk to him."

* * *

"Sei."

"What do you want?" His voice was like ice and Noiz flinched, circling him like a wild animal, afraid of his teeth sinking in, of showing the tender flesh beneath his hard skin.

"To apologize. To explain."

"Explain what?

"I… I don't know." Oh shit, he really hadn't thought this through, not even remotely sure what he wanted to say.

"Well you're off to a good start then."

"Sei, I don't… I don't get why you're mad at me. I mean… You've never cared about me messing around with people before." Not only to mention that it had nothing to do with anything that had happened, the photo's being on display and his sleeping around weren't remotely connected.

"I never liked it, I didn't understand why you'd do that to yourself." He shook his head, black hair swinging and hiding his face, "if you felt lonely, why didn't you just say? Why did you go off with strangers and do stupid things?"

He couldn't speak, voice clogged in his throat because Sei was right, he did get lonely, but he couldn't go to his friends because it wasn't fair on them to be a burden.

"I don't know."

"I shouldn't have yelled at you, I'm not even sure why I'm angry." Sei admitted, sighing and almost deflating, as if all of his rage had seeped out in that one breath, not moving when Noiz sat in front of him, crossing his legs under himself. "Sorry."

He didn't know what to say, they didn't argue, they never did. "Mizuki got an A."

His head lifted up, expression hopeful, maybe slightly sheepish as he managed a small smile, "yeah?"

"Mm, apparently our forms look good together." Noiz had overheard Mizuki saying that to someone earlier, he had little idea of what it actually meant, but it sounded good so he guessed he couldn't complain.

"I think general consensus is that we look good together," Sei smiled, thinking of the worryingly large amount of girls who had made the effort to tell him how cute he and Noiz were and offer them congratulations.

Noiz exhaled in amusement, poking at Sei with his toe playfully, relieved when he poked back a second later, things were almost back to normal again, and he was so glad.

* * *

Two weeks had passed since their argument, their weird, illogical argument that Noiz still couldn't work out, and he still wasn't sure what was going on with them. They'd fallen back into their old routine as best friends, ignoring the nosy stares of other students and explaining to everyone in their friendship group, with Mizuki's help, that they were in fact, categorically not together.

Their lives continued as normal, with the usual Friday film night at Noiz's apartment going on as always, pizzas consumed and ice-cream softening on the coffee table.

"What's this?" Sei asked, picking up a blank envelope, A4 sized and unaddressed but obviously full of something, sticky strip torn open.

"Mizuki's pictures, he sent me a copy, said he was gunna do you one too." He answered easily enough, he wasn't sure what he was going to do with them, maybe he'd frame one of the less weird ones and put in in his room. It would be kinda cute. "You can look if you want."

Sei did, sliding them carefully out of the envelope, trying not to touch the glossy surface, knowing he'd make them greasy and smudged with his pizza fingers, eyes scanning over them, pausing on the one before the kiss, capturing the second before their lips met.

An idea was forming in his mind, a stupid idea that could fuck things up again, but he couldn't help it as he spoke, "what would you do if I asked you again?"

There was a spoon in Noiz's mouth, chocolate ice-cream disappearing into his stomach as he turned to regard his friend, eyebrow cocked curiously, "asked me what?"

"To kiss me."

Noiz's adams apple bobbed as he swallowed, sweet flavour leaving his mouth dry, "I guess you'd have to try it and see."

Sei just nodded, replacing the pictures in the envelope a second later and sliding in a new DVD as if he had never asked, topic unmentioned the rest of the night.

* * *

"Sure you don't want me to walk you home?" He wouldn't normally ask, but it was darker than normal, they'd decided to watch a third film to avoid an argument, and it had gotten later than normal, past midnight when Sei got up to leave.

"I'll be fine, Noiz." Sei smiled fondly, pulling on his hoodie and lacing his vans onto his feet, cat patterned socks disappearing under the black fabric and straightening up in front of the door. "I'll message you when I'm home."

Noiz just nodded, satisfied at the answer, though he knew Sei always let him know he was safely inside where he should be, somehow it made him feel much more peaceful, he always felt slightly restless when he messaged late or forgot. "Alright, I think Koujaku's having people at his tomorrow, but I'll let you know."

Sei nodded, knowing that meant more alcohol than was sensible and more than a little stupidity for him to watch, it should be a good night, provided nobody (Aoba) ended up being sick. That would normally be his que to leave, but he hesitated, half out of the doorway into the plain hallway beyond.

"I was just going to ask you something."

"Yeah? What's up?" Noiz asked, leaning casually against the doorframe in his sweatpants, hair messy and stomach almost too full of junk food, just looking forward to getting into bed.

"Kiss me goodnight?" His words shook slightly, scared to ask this again after last time, but knowing he needed to know. Couldn't stand not knowing any more how Noiz felt, how their relationship was going to work from now on.

Noiz only hesitated for a second, mouth twitching upwards and leaning forwards like it was routine, cupping Sei's cheek and moulding their lips together, just a peck at first, Sei's arms around his neck, hesitating.

"Again." Now he kissed him properly, mouth parting and poking his tongue out way too early to follow any kind of kissing etiquette, not that he'd ever follow such a thing, only stopping when Sei's coil rang.

"Oh for…" He muttered, clearly irritated as he answered, "Aoba? Yes I… I know… With Noiz… Yeah, I was just about to… Okay… Yeah, bye, bye."

"You better go," Noiz raised his eyebrows, knowing Aoba was probably less than impressed at how late he'd kept his brother.

"Yeah, I'll message you." He turned to go, hesitating at the last minute, returning to press a quick kiss to the corner of Noiz's mouth, smile shy but bright. "Night."

* * *

This wasn't the normal situation, usually when Sei came over in the morning he let himself in, so there was no change there, but usually Noiz didn't feel like squirming with discomfort. Should he kiss Sei? Hug him? Was he allowed to? Or had last night just been a one-time thing, a curious question or the desire to remind himself what it was like?

But luckily he didn't have to wait long, staying on the sofa and offering a greeting as Sei pulled off his boots and jacket, crossing the room to join him and elbowing him until he paused his game, turning to look at him.

"Hm?" He asked, trying to pretend he wasn't looking at Sei's lips.

"Kiss me good morning?"

Noiz just smiled, complying easily and letting a satisfied hum escape as they separated, "you know you don't have to ask?"

That just got him another kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr at- minky-way.tumblr.com


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